Isn’t age an absolute curse? I never thought in my wildest dreams when I was 13 years old that I would ever get to this decrepit stage where I was actually 55 going on 56! I think the big problem with age is one of the mind – my mind is telling me I am about 35 while my bones and back are telling me to get real!
Eyesight? Yes that deteriorates but not as fast as I thought it would. Maybe it has something to do with looking at a computer monitor day in and day out. However, it was brought home to me when I went to have my eyes tested last year, the optician told me not to bother buying any glasses that were expensive, as they would need replacing nearly ever two or three months. How dare you, I thought, however those words have rung true and now I have the utmost difficulty in reading anything too close or too far away. It has to be in a certain position with a good light and then there is no problem at all.
Memory? Sorry what am I doing here – why am I writing this? Yes, memory just disappears in a puff of smoke! All those music hall jokes about going to the toilet and forgetting why you went. That is no joke, believe me! My memory has become so bad that I can be talking to a friend I have known for years and suddenly start calling them by some absurd name that just flew into my head! I can reminisce for hours on end about ‘the old days’ but, ask me what happened a minute ago and I am stuck!
The Body? Oh, my dear! Well, it is true that everything migrates south and not for the winter. Once it’s there, it doesn’t want to come back. My nipples used to be about 6 inches higher than they are. My backside is trailing on the floor and my hands have ‘things’ growing on the skin. Not to worry, said the doctor, it’s just age!
Hair? Teeth? forget them – best not to even go there!
Sex Drive? Well, I have to say that has not changed an ounce. I was a horny bugger and still am. Luckily I have someone who can fulfil that part of my life. However, don’t expect me to be getting into all those positions I did when I was 20. I might just be able to move a couple of feet around the bed before passing out.
Yes, age is a curse but it is also a fantastic feeling. I can now say things to people I would never have dreamed of saying before. Either they think I’m batty or that I’ve lost it. Doesn’t matter to me, the truth will out and it does especially from an older person. I have to say that I am happy feeling the way I do, even although I grump about it morn to midnight. I believe I am lucky, in that I found a younger person to become my life-long partner and he keeps me feeling young – if I had ended up with someone my own age or older – then I would be looking for the gun to put us both out of our misery!!
